Not even a good haircut can fix this!

There I sat in the shampoo chair - enjoying getting my hair washed - the warm water, the aromatic oils that had been rubbed on my temples - so relaxing!  I needed a good haircut - to shape up my hair, make me feel refreshed and invigorated.  After finishing the shampoo and walking over to the salon chair with my hair in the towel I caught a glimpse of someone in the mirror - a heavy girl oddly enough with the same earrings as I was wearing, humph...she must have pretty good taste.  Salons are notorious for mirrors all around you (so if you get a good haircut Yay! but if you get a bad haircut crap!!).  Then as I sit down in the stylists' chair I notice that the "heavy" girl IS ME!  I stare for a minute...granted no one is pretty with all of their hair twisted and piled high on their head - but it's me!  Lucky for me this is a FULL mirror - floor to ceiling and set an angle - and I'm wearing a skirt and I don't have the luxury of having a smock on yet - so I get the full view - my from my thick ankles to my heavy thighs to my roll that is touching both arm rests on each side as I'm sitting there all the way up to my big boobs sitting on top of my roll and then my heavy face/cheeks.  WOW!

Oddly enough the girl looking at me in the mirror isn't how I feel - i don't feel like I look like her - but it's me.  Reality is starting to sink in....and I realize what i've been doing....for the past few years I've been avoiding looking at the real me....by getting my nails done, feet manicured, eyebrows waxed, hair highlighted and cut...all in an effort to make myself look better...but in reality...i've put all of this effort into "fixing" myself when the real "fix" would be to loose weight.  because when I look at myself in the mirror at the salon I realize that no haircut can fix this.  I can keep going back and cutting and highlighting and it's never gonna be just right - because it won't fix the fat!  I've got to fix the fat!!!

The first time I entered on this blog was in February...now it's July 25th and where am I?  Same place (if not worse) than I was on Feb. 6th!  So I'm going to make msyelf enter comments on this blog EVERYDAY!!!!!  no matter what to keep my weightloss goal in front of me!  Something must be entered - doesn't matter if it's substantial - just something!

Day 1

So...after years of dieting and loosing and gaining i'm now in my 30's...ok...33...and i'm still fat!  I hate having to shop around "what fits" not "what looks good".  I've had babies...ok twins...8 months ago - it's time to get the baby weight and the other weight off...for good...thinking if I have a blog that I write in EVERY SINGLE DAY that I'll be better at this - blogging is easier than writing and keep a journal - and well, i've tried everythign else..why not this!  So...here goes!
Today - i've only eaten and egg mcmuffin and had some coffee..not bad huh?  Let' just hope my chocoalte craving doesn't kick in later - and speaking of chocolate - time to rid the house of valentine's candy! 

At lunch today i'm going to visit the new Earth Fare - i'm definitely going to get stuff to cook Quinoa - a new for me...and will keep to my healthy plan - b/c when i'm in control of my eating i'm more in control of my life! 

It's only 10:42 a.m. though...so...to be continued!